Narnia Adventure
“Hello, Mrs. Benson.”
“Hi Peter. What’re you boys up to do today?”
“Just a little hiking.”
“Be sure, to come home before dark.”
“Okay, Mom.”
**********
Outside, Peter tugged Andy’s arm.
“What’s the rush?”
“I found the wardrobe. We can experience what happened in Narnia.”
“Ugh … it stinks in here.”
**********
“We’re so sorry, Mrs. Benson.”
Her body wrenched.
“Officers, it can’t be. They’re good boys. Who’d do this to them?”
“The abandoned lot is a druggy hangout. They must’ve stumbled across a
strung out junky. It looks like they found a sword among the rubble..”
“It’s the weapon the killer used.”
2015©Isadora DeLaVega
Genre: Crime Flash Fiction
Word Count: 100
To join Rochelle and her Friday Fictioneers in this challenge click here or the froggy button
***** The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe is a high fantasy novel for children by C. S. Lewis, published by Geoffrey Bles in 1950. It was the first published of seven novels in The Chronicles of Narnia (1950–1956) and the best known; among all the author’s books it is the most widely held in libraries. Although it was written as well as published first in the series, it is volume two in recent editions, which are sequenced according to Narnia history (the first being The Magician’s Nephew). Like the others, it was illustrated by Pauline Baynes, and her work has been retained in many later editions.
information from wikipedia
December 11, 2015 at 5:08 am
can anyone say about my blog…please…im waiting for your comments..
https://healthnfitlifes.wordpress.com/
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December 9, 2015 at 8:56 am
nice twist…super…thanks for nice post
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December 9, 2015 at 4:53 pm
I’m pleased you enjoyed my take on the photo prompt. I always enjoy
seeing new visitors. Thank you for leaving your very nice comment.
Isadora 😎
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December 10, 2015 at 4:40 am
welcome….welcome…thanks for your reply comment…
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December 7, 2015 at 5:34 pm
A chilling detour from the magic of Narnia, Isadora. Packs a punch in those final lines!
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December 8, 2015 at 3:27 pm
The innocence of the two boys left them vulnerable to the horror that lurks in
around every corner now-a-days. Their adventure had to end in tragdey for impact.
I’m happy you were able to see that in my story, Dawn. Thnak you.
Isadora 😎
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December 7, 2015 at 10:50 am
A grim twist on the Narnia story. Well told.
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December 7, 2015 at 12:14 pm
This little adventure had an unfortunate ending. I’ll stick with the Narnia tales, Margaret.
Thank you for visiting my blog and commenting. I’m pleased you enjoyed my story.
Isadora 😎
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December 7, 2015 at 3:17 am
NOT what I was looking for! Wow!
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December 7, 2015 at 11:57 am
We can’t conceive of such a twist if we’ve read Narnia. I’m happy, Roger, that it had a “Wow”
effect for you when you read it. A very nice compliment in your comment. Thank you for that
and for visiting my blog.
Isadora 😎
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December 6, 2015 at 11:41 am
Well that didn’t go where I had hoped, ditto Peter, I’m sure. Definitely prefer C.S.Lewis’ version!
If you’ll forgive a little comment, I was a bit confused by Peter calling her “Mrs Benson” and then “Mom” in the first section. Re-reading I think she must be Andy’s Mom and it’s him speaking that line, so I got there in the end and I know the limit would have made it hard to add an attribution or two to clear that up.
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December 7, 2015 at 12:09 pm
We can’t conceive of such a twist if we’ve read Narnia – right? I prefer the original too.
But, we’re supposed to imagine something with the photo prompt and Narnia came to mind instantly.
My youngest daughter(now 38) adored the book. We talked about it at dinner all the time.
I don’t mind the critique at all. I welcome it. I had the same confusion when I read it back for editing. I would change
a word here and there and still have your same question. Finally, I gave up as I was altering it too much and nothing was making
sense. Can that happen?
Yes, You have it right. She is Andy’s Mom. I was trying to show that Andy was a polite and nice little boy by having him answer his
Mom. When I tried to eliminate that line it seemed like he was being rude. Anyway, as you mentioned in your comment, the word limit
was on my mind the entire time too.
I’m pleased you were able to see who was who. Thank you for stopping by and leaving your very nice comment and critiquing.
Isadora 😎
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December 4, 2015 at 5:29 pm
Not exactly the happy ending they were looking for… well done! 🙂
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December 5, 2015 at 5:30 pm
A fun adventure turns into a tragedy instantly. It’s s sad world we live in.
Thank you for the comment and visit.
Isadora 😎
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December 4, 2015 at 11:49 am
Oh, this is so tragic. Even more for the fact they never experienced the real adventure.
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December 5, 2015 at 5:27 pm
It’s a different world now-a-days. Innocent fun and games can turn into a tragedy instantly.
Thank you for stopping by for a visit and commenting. I appreciate it.
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 9:02 pm
I love a good twist in the tale, Issy. Well done. 🙂
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December 3, 2015 at 9:17 pm
I like an unexpected ending or a shock or two. It helps to create exciement.
Glad you enjoyed, Syliva. Thanks for visiting and commenting.
Issy 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 6:49 pm
Oh no! Innocence totally lost. How sad. Remember when we used to be able to play and not worry about such dangers?
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December 3, 2015 at 9:16 pm
It’s a different world. Sadly, kids are missing out on many things because of all the maniacs that want to kill
for no reason at all. I pray we can begin to change these horrible things going on. Then, kids will be able to
be kids once again.
Thanks for poppping in, dear friend. Happy Mid-Week to you !!!
Izz😎y
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December 4, 2015 at 12:46 am
Always love to read what you have to offer, Izzy!
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December 7, 2015 at 12:11 pm
😎
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December 3, 2015 at 3:36 pm
Got a pain in my neck from the rapid twist this took!
Really well done! Definitely not a Wardrobe after all…
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December 3, 2015 at 5:05 pm
Sorry about the whiplash but I only had 100 words to work with. 😁
This story was the first thing that popped into my mind. Grisly … right?
A mothers worse nightmare. Thanks for the visit and very nice words.
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 5:15 pm
But oh so with it!
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December 3, 2015 at 2:31 pm
What a horrible twist. The boys’ love for adventure is so realistic, great writing.
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December 3, 2015 at 5:03 pm
I’m beaming from your stellar comment, Gahlearner. I went with what first came to mind when I saw the photo.
Thank you sor stopping by and leaving a comment.
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 2:23 pm
A heart wrenching tale Isadora. A great story and well done.
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December 3, 2015 at 5:01 pm
A mothers worse nightmare in this story, PJ. I’m delighted you felt it was well done.
Thank you ..
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 1:30 pm
Querida Isadora,
What a grisly twist. I was expecting magic not murder. Muy bien, amiga.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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December 3, 2015 at 4:58 pm
Querida Rochelle,
I read your comment quickly (I’m always excited to see what you have to say about my stories) and had to laugh.
I thought grisly was gristle. LOLOL Hope you had a good laugh too ???!!!
My mind goes to strange places when I first see the photo. I go by my first reaction. I will stick with the Narnia tales.
Gracias y Shalom,
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 12:58 pm
That took a dark twist! Well done.
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December 3, 2015 at 4:50 pm
For some reason, the photo gave me a dark feeling. Then, I started to write. I wish I had been able to have
more than 100 words. Thank you for your very nice comment and visit.
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 12:12 pm
Alas Narnia might be wonderful, but it was also a dangerous place to hang out at.
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December 3, 2015 at 4:47 pm
This little adventure had an unfortunate ending. I’ll stick with the Narnia tales.
Thanks for stopping by, Bjorn. It’s always a pleasure to read your comments.
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 7:37 am
Well you certainly turned that one on its head. Not what I was expecting from a Narnia tale… Well done.
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December 3, 2015 at 4:44 pm
It was a surprise to me when I read it back for editing, Sandra. My mind does go to strange places. 😁
Thank you for your very nice comment
Isadora 😎
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December 3, 2015 at 6:54 am
A powerful and cautionary tale Issy, I think I’ll stick with Narnia.
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December 3, 2015 at 4:39 pm
I think I will stick with the Narnia tales too. 😎
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