Inside the Mind of Isadora

Tag Archives: moon


by 28 Comments

Friday Fictioneers – The Flame Flickered

Friday Fictioneers - moon-and-sky1.webPhoto Prompt – ©Madison Woods

I can see the flicker from my living room window, especially on this blackened night. I know it’s that damn candle. The flame is flickering like a bolt of lightning piercing through the sky.

I can’t understand why Mona wanted someone to take care of the horses. I was still capable after my heart attack.

Dang, doesn’t that cowhand get it??? That barn could go up in flames in a minute and light up the sky.

My patience is wearing thin.

But, I’m reduced to silence. I know what she’ll say.

“No need to worry, honey, it’ll be fine.” “Relax.”

2015©isadora delavega

 

Genre: Fiction
Word Count: 100 Words

 To join Rochelle and her Friday Fictioneers in this challenge click here:
****** Revision: I revised two line to help the reader better understand who the main character (the husband) is referring to.
To maintain the 100 word count, I eliminated a word in one sentence and made it two sentences.
Hope this makes the story flow better.
Thank you for my blog critiques.
Dang, didn’t he get it?> original line
Dang, doesn’t that cowhand get it?> revised line
But, I’m reduced to silence because I know what she’ll say>: original line
But, I’m reduced to silence. I know what she’ll say>: revised line
Cowhand – a cowboy employed to tend or ranch cattle or horses; a cowboy or cowgirl.